The Kids are Alright

I noticed some unusual activity on my blog today-- this "old" post has suddenly been blowing up the stats on my blog. People from the UK, the Philipines, to the Ivory Coast have been making a beeline for this offhand post that details my hopes and dreams to put a shellacking on my friend in our tennis match. Sure, I think I'm witty as hell, and of course I should be drawing an international readership, but obviously something unusual was afoot. Naturally, I had to investigate.

So it turns out that a young lady and British tennis hopeful by the name of Naomi Broady has fallen into disgrace in the past couple of days. Apparently Miss Broady has a page on a social networking site where she imprudently posted pics of herself in a nightclub, and made the admission that her major "turn-off" is 'hangovers after a good nite owt'. Me too, sister! One can only hope that the spelling was a youthful attempt at ghetto-fabulousness.

Well, that stodgy LTA (Lawn Tennis Association) has suspended her for misconduct, or something of that ilk. Seems they want to maintain a pristine image of the racket-wielding set.

I have a message for Miss Broady: get yourself the hell across the pond, pronto! Athletes have to do some hardcore sh*t over here to fall onto such hard times. Kobe Bryant (accused rapist), Jennifer Capriati (former drug addict, complete with mugshots), Ray Lewis (involved in scuffle/murder), Bill Belichek (CHEATING), O.J. Simpson (just a little double-murder)... you can do pretty much anything you want over here-- short of killing dogs-- and you'll do just fine.

So pack your bags, move to south Florida, keep up the clubbing, leak a sex tape and you'll have a Bacardi endorsement in no time. In fact, if you could manage a photographed make-out session with Paris Hilton, you may never have to play tennis at all (looking at you, Anna Kournivkova).